Tuesday, 11 May 2010

Fresh expressions of Labour

I haven't blogged much on the Election.  Mostly because my random, not very well thought out batch of libertarian beliefs tends to be more suited to Twitter where you don't need to justify yourself in 140 characters.

But I'm a bit worried about what New Labour is now going to call itself, now it's no longer shiny and New.  I suggest that they could take some hints from the world of new Bible translations, which would provide all the following possibilities.  And the good news (if you'll excuse the pun) is that these Fresh Expressions of Labour could all exist at the same time.  Gotta catch them all...

New International Labour - an old-fashioned attitude to politics but expressed in new language.

New English Labour - committed to Anglo-Saxon self-determination, as a corrective to the last 13 years of Celtic rule.

New Revised Standard Labour - relentlessly political correct, but worded slightly strangely.

Today's New International Labour - quite politically correct, but not so popular as the original.

Good News Labour - policies in simple 1960s English, but all the politicians are just two-dimensional caricatures.

Updated (thanks, Simon):

On Message - Contemporary, simple, can be condensed to fit a txt message.  But not much like the real, traditional Labour.


Simon C said...

I was wondering how you would describe (off-)Message Labour.

G said...

Thanks, Simon. Now included.

Sally said...

how about Amplified Labour?

or even stranger still. Living Labour?

RobinsonS said...

Stock Car Racing? http://www.zondervan.com/Cultures/en-US/Product/ProductDetail.htm?ProdID=com.zondervan.9780310948636&QueryStringSite=Zondervan (a personal favourite)

Steve Borthwick said...

Laboured? :)

Yewtree said...

New American Standard Labour: the Blairite tendency to do whatever the Americans want.

GOD's WORD Labour - the tendency of certain Labour politicians to think that they have a hotline to God.

And I'm very worried by the Westminster Leningrad Codex!

(all versions listed at biblegateway.com